It Puts the Sports Bra On…

Workouts are a bitch.

Time is never on your side.

Television and couch potatoitis sucks the life out of you.

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But this girl has begun to Kickstart her life in the ass… And the normal guy has pumped me up.

I’m a beachbody coach who’s about to make myself workout daily, stop eating cookies eat better, and start lookin sexy on the daily.

So the first step shall begin:

It puts the sports bar on…

Second step:

Order PiYo and get a team together (join me! Just message me for the details!)

But hey, put the bra on first because, let’s face it, that’s the hardest part in the morning – not letting your girls relax anymore.

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Sex up the Fall – Couch Potato Style

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Fall is coming – Which means new television shows, more blockbuster movies, and endless amounts of food and holiday cheer (if you’re into that sort of thing… I’m not *stands in corner protecting Christmas Tree put up in July*)

Those New Year’s Resolutions you’ve been clinging onto (hardly) in hopes to have nailed your swim suit ready look are out the window come October (yes, people prep their stomachs to be able to handle the overload come Thanksgiving).

So I say, stuff your face with good intentions. Good food, good people, good televsion is on its way – embrace the change (yes, I’m referring to your pant size).

Here is a quick workout from the best person on the planet – a couch potato.

1. Remote Access – Leave the remote on the coffee table. Each time a commercial comes up you can lean forward, fast forward, and lean back. That’s like a ten second ab workout! Go you, you crazy wild tiger!

2. Spoon Yourself – Eating dinner on the couch? Sit at the edge of the couch, sitting straight up. Bring the silverware to you. Whoa – what happened – that’s right, we’re promoting great posture and strengthened those arms of yours!

3. Leg up – Do you stretch out on the couch? During a show make a point to lift your legs up above it’s resting place and count to five. Do this during the entire show and you’ve worked your leg muscles! You wo’t even need to wear heels to tighten those calves anymore… MEOW!

4. Head Rush – Lay upside down on your couch while watching a show. This provides an alternate angle for your viewing pleasure AND stretches out your back!

5. Dance Dumb – Your fav television show is about to start? Listen to the intro music and do a quick ten second dance. Jab your arms, kick your feet, and wiggle all about! If your man OR woman is around – a free lap dance doesn’t hurt – just make sure you’ve recorded the new fall preview. You don’t want to be the only one NOT talking about it the next day!

Craplandia Disclaimer: This is not terrible advice but if you’re looking for weight loss I’d suggest you find someone who actually has experience with the art of motivation and weight loss.

But you’re skinny – A growing epidemic

From the overweight:

I can’t lose the weight

I stress eat

I’m not good enough

From the skinny:

I can’t get fat

I stress eat

I’m not good enough

Society thinks the same. No one wants to be overweight and unhealthy. We want to be OUR perfect weight, where no one talks about us. How skinny we are and how they jealous they’ve become, or how much we’ve grown – and not in the good way.

We try to make goals for ourselves. Let’s face it – most of society has a food addiction making those goals even harder to handle.

You get out of bed and immediately crave a donut. You stop yourself from picturing your grubby hands on the deliciousness. Battle 1 – Won. You start to drive to work and pass your favorite donut shop. Battle 2 – Won. You wish you felt victory. Instead you feel guilt for not getting what you wanted AND realize you have twelve more battles to win as there are twelve fast food restaurants between you and ultimate victory.

How can we find something that tastes just like the donut but doesn’t have all the calories?

Where is the happy medium between good and bad?

How can the sadness of not liking who we are keep us from working out?

Today I will focus on the small victories and give myself a few tastks.

I did not pick up a donut – Small Hooray

I will do yoga to practice my breathing and rid me of guilt for not picking up that tasty treat.

I will eat a healthy homemade dinner.

I will jump on the trampline for at least ten minutes.

This is all I can promise myself and today that will have to be enough.

What promises have you made lately? What victories do you have under your belt this week?

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