I’m a 64 cent stripper

I’m quietly and respectively sitting in a McDonald’s drive-thru waiting for a small ice cream cone, minding my own business, when that normal guy sticks a dollar in my shirt.

Me: I’m now a fast food whore.

That Normal Guy (paying no mind to me): I put a dollar in your string.

Me: I’m officially the cheapest stripper.

That Normal Guy *still feeling awesome* (in a weird voice): I put it in your string but not your g-string.

Yup, I’m still a cheap date.

Lesson: Be a fast food whore if it gets you a 64 cent vanilla cone.